I just learned that dynamite is made from peanuts.
Is this a thing that everybody knew and no one wanted to tell me? Were all my friends sitting around at parties discussing the peanut-dynamite phenomenon but becoming awkwardly silent the second I walked into the room?
"Don't tell Jill about the dynamite," they would whisper. "And the peanuts. She can't take it. It will BLOW HER MIND!!!"
(pun not intended)
Truth be told, the prospect of dynamite-peanuts does concern me.
For the elephants, you see. The poor, unsuspecting, exploding elephants.
Well, also for the people who have to clean up the exploding elephants. And for the elephants with long memories who have to remember their friends, the exploding elephants. And for the lovely women wearing sequins who are riding the exploding elephants when suddenly, and without warning, there is no more elephant on which to ride.
Ok friends, I need you to be honest with me here. Was Dumbo's mom REALLY killed after she ate a dynamite-peanut? I can take it.
Oh, and one more thing: Screw you, Alfred Nobel.